Is it more challenging to be honest with other people or to be honest with yourself? To be honest with other people about difficult things is challenging but there is a degree of understanding that it is best and the responsible relational rule to follow. So many of us have seen the effects of dishonesty in relationships and with those images burned into our minds, we are careful to not either repeat it if the images are personally ours or to create such images if we have none from personal experience.
But to be truly honest with yourself is very difficult. In many ways, there is no accountability to anyone in this matter. You simply have to make the difficult and very conscious choice to be honest with yourself about your thoughts, your feelings, your tendencies, your weaknesses, your justifications, etc. Occassionally someone knows you well enough that they are able to call you on it but there are areas that are not known to anyone but yourself. At that point, when you are faced with a reality or awareness that you may be deceiving yourself but to accept it and be honest may lead to an outcome that you don’t hope for . . . well, what do you do? And beyond that, when you get to this point and you realize and accept the fact that you have been deceiving yourself, whether intentionally or not, how do you know that your aren’t deceiving yourself in other areas and just haven’t realized it yet? And on a further level, what happens when you realize the personal deception after someone else has associated themselves with the deceived you? That’s a difficult and disillusioned journey to make and to bring someone through.
Just some thoughts I’ve had lately.
Now to unexpected blessings of the day: picnic lunch with a friend on a GORGEOUS Friday; a former youth stopping by and sharing with me updates on life and her call to ministry; a phone call from a neighbor.
Tomorrow is barn-swinging day! YEE-HAW! I’m taking a busload of youth to Ozark, MO, for an afternoon of fun and swinging. I love this trip and am so looking forward to hanging out with all my awesome youth. You make my life grand and rich and blessed. I love you all more than I could ever convey in words.
Later gators and PEACE – Melissa