I have issues with trust. I’ve blogged about it before. Trusting people, trusting myself, trusting God.
I also am compulsive about trying to understand. Not so much how a DVR machine works or how to utilize most of the features on my Nikon camera instead of the two I use. Rather I am compulsive about understanding people and matters of the heart. If a relationship fails and I can’t understand why, it consumes me. If someone inflicts pain on another without remorse, their action inflicts confusion in me. When famine and other disasters strike, they destroy peace of mind.
Many days I don’t understand God. And that bothers me. Often. I want to understand God. I want to get inside His head and understand Her reasoning. I want to have a rational explanation for the things that don’t make sense to me and to so many others. And these things are numerous.
It is easy to mistake the quest for understanding as something God delights in. I think we teach that belief – sometimes overtly, sometimes subconsciously. Over and over we push ourselves and others to “pursue” God, to come to “know” God and inadvertently, we’ve crossed the line into understanding God = depth of relationship with God.
But that isn’t the case. My devotion reminded me of that this morning. It is from an outstanding devotion book entitled “Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence” by Sarah Young. Let me share this excerpt with you:
Understanding will never bring you Peace. That’s why I [God] have instructed you to trust in Me, not in your understanding. Human beings have a voracious appetite for trying to figure things outs, in order to gain a sense of mastery over their lives. (CONTROL FREAKS – my paraphrase)…. My Peace is not an elusive goal, hidden at the center of some complicated maze. Actually, you are always enveloped in Peace, which is inherent in My Presence. As you look to Me, you gain awareness of this precious Peace.
We crave Peace. I hunger for peace. I often succumb to the temptation that peace comes through understanding. Which is why I’m usually hungry for peace because understanding rarely provides it. Maybe temporary peace but never lasting peace. Peace comes through trust. Trusting in God and residing in His Presence. Doesn’t that even sound more peaceful? Rather than feeling burdened about trying to figure something out we, instead, simply need to reside in God’s Presence and let God envelop us in Peace. Like a God Snuggy.
Today, a Twitter friend posted this fill-in-the-blank question: “Today I will ________________ instead of ___________________.” He started it off by saying, “Today I will choose gratefulness instead of complaining.” I need that one today. I responded, “Today I will trust God instead of trying to understand God.”.
Question: Do you struggle to trust God? Are you a compulsive understand-er like me? How would you answer the question, “Today I will _______________ instead of _____________.” As aways I’d love to hear your thoughts by scrolling down to the comment section or by clicking this: comment section.